I'll pass on the jicama...

Okay, so what the hell is a jicama anyway? That is my produce of the week…by which to measure the alien princess. Well, we had our 32 week appointment yesterday and it turns out Helen is more like a cantaloupe or honeydew melon than a damn "large jicama". Yes, the good doctor informed us that our precious “little” girl is weighing in around 5 pounds these days. Great, you say? Yeah, except that she’s only supposed to be 3 1/2 pounds these days. I’m going with the obvious again: she’s all legs. Got to be it. I mean, by the kicks to the ribs she administers (and of course my genes) it's apparent. Speaking of kicks, she gave me one to the bladder last night, and I lost it. Literally. Ahhh, the joys of pregnancy!